Lots of things in the last ten days | specialagentscully's Blog

I fought for my project, to become a vet assistant. Following my age, and background, I could work on field as well as I would study. And with graduation, become a vet. It's not for now, but it's plausible. I have worked enough. And I have a little money, to buy a small car, and go there, maybe in september, maybe in next january. But it's possible, and achievable. And I defended my project too, so I was accorded a sort of grant, for my studies. It would be definitely interesting, intellectually, emotionally, humanly. I could have worked with humans, long ago. I think it's just not for me. Although it's easier to explain to a human being why they must take a med. The animal doesn't see it the same. But I like it. And I have more patience with them. No more empathy than for humans though. As a goal, and an ideal, I could work with both. I just feel more comfortable with animals.

Then, if no one knows already, I fucked up at work. They weren't evil with me, just noticed. As I've worked well for the last two years, I won't be blamed eitther. But it's a stain. I've thought a lot about it already. It was a mistake, sure, and an accident, more than a habit. But i'l have to be careful.

My cat Luna, my last one, nine months, has been sick for about ten days now. I brought her to a clinic, at night, in emergency. Then a check three days after. She's going slowly better. But not fast enough for the vets. She's young, and her immune system is not as strong as her sisters, in spire of good care, and medical attention.  No need to specify I'm not giving up on her. It's more difficult than others to give her meds. She makes herself drool, not to swallow them. Even Scully, with her bad temper wasn't as difficut. She's a good cat though, not aggressive. She had to have serum injections under the skin. Two of them, which is painful for the animal, but an immediate benefit. Only two of the others sneezed, a little for one, a bit more for the other. So I give them a preventive med. To all. It's preventive for coryza, and also attacking a possible fixation of the virus on the cells. They are better already. It's a non invasive med. Unless for Luna, who has to take antibiotics. Yes, it has been difficult for me too. It's never easy to see a living creatures hurt like that. You have to be patient, and cool, and think of them first. It's humanly very fulfilling. Emotionally, it's exhausting. But it's worth it.

It looks to be better with Mulder. Slowly. And with our very unusual way to communicate. But we don't need to say much. We just know. It will take more time, for me more. But it's, okay, I guess. I also have very good friends, supportive, although i don't show them a lot. Weird, i'm not alone, but I feel lonely. It hasn't happened to me for a long time.

I hope the biggest of the storm has passed. I need to rest, and more to take time for myself. Now I've got it with Luna, but in the beginning, I could spend one hour and a half to give her her meds, with breaks, not for me, for her. She was stressed. I spent most of my evening doing that. It's late now already, but i so need this time alone. Being an intovert, and having a bad communication, isn't easy everyday. Well, except with living creatures who hurt, apparently. It's been lots of emotions. Mostly not expressed. I guess I'm gonna pay that. Later. Not now. I can't.